Praying for Patience

“Don’t pray for patience!”

Perhaps you have heard someone exclaim this phrase or have even uttered it yourself. If so, you know the drill:

“Don’t pray for patience, or you’ll get stuck in traffic!”

                                “Don’t pray for patience, or God will make you wait.”

                                                                “Pray for patience? Are you sure you want to do that?”

I’ve heard statements like these, frequently uttered with a laugh, as long as I can remember, but it’s only been in the past few years that I have begun to understand how they have affected my own thought process.  As I’ve come to evaluate these warnings, I’ve discovered two ways in which the underlying mindset behind them is profoundly incorrect and downright dangerous.

First, these comments are spoken from the assumption, whether conscious or not, that God is what some have termed a “cosmic killjoy,” that He is all about making our lives as frustrating and difficult as possible. Now while it is true that God never promises us happy lives of constant pleasure and that as followers of Christ we are guaranteed to share in His suffering, it is also true that God does not withhold blessings (sometimes physical, but often spiritual) from His children. At His core He is good, and in His dealings He is good.  

Statements like “Don’t pray for patience, or you’ll get stuck in traffic” or “Don’t pray for help loving people, or God will send you a bunch of jerks,” imply that God will necessarily respond to your request for something good by forcing you to go through something hard or frustrating. Such an assumption became dangerous in my own life because it began to seep into other facets of my mindset to the point that I became hesitant to pray about certain things for fear of God’s taking them away or somehow bringing difficulty to my life through them.

—until one day the absurdity of this hesitancy hit me like a ton of bricks.

What an injustice to God’s Name to deny His wisdom in allowing what He chooses to allow. What a gross misrepresentation of His character to assume that He will always reward prayer with hardship!

And then I thought, but so what if He does?

Knowing that God is all-good and all-wise and that, because I am His child, He has my best interests at heart, then even if He does allow hardship and pain in my life in order to grow and refine me, would such hardship and pain not be worth it? Would it not be better to suffer hardship in the process of becoming more like Christ than it would be to live a life of perfect ease outside of the will of God?

This is not to say that suffering is enjoyable or that the Christian life is totally devoid of happiness and pleasure—quite the contrary!—but merely to highlight the way in which we as Christians should view hardship. We should not be afraid of its coming, because we have a Father who will never leave us nor forsake us, who will strengthen us and sustain us. And we certainly should not let a fear of potential suffering keep us from communing with our Father in prayer!

Advising someone against praying for patience, then, (or for kindness or self-control) not only can lead to a wrong view of God but also can hinder communication with Him.

The second (and perhaps more obvious) problem with saying “Don’t pray for patience” is that doing so is encouraging someone not to pray for a virtue that is clearly biblical to possess. Patience is an element of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22); it is something that believers are exhorted to “put on” (Col. 3:12); and it is the goal of Paul’s prayer for strength for the Colossians (Col. 1:11).

If patience is evidence of our being filled with God’s Spirit, then why on earth would we want to avoid asking for it? Why would we quench the Spirit’s work in our lives by balking at the idea of being taught patience? After all, it’s not like we aren’t already in a position of waiting for things. Would it not be ultimately for our good to pray for help learning to be patient as we wait, to pray for the Holy Spirit to fill us to the point where patience becomes characteristic of our being? I daresay it would be.

So next time you think twice about praying for patience, ask yourself which would be better: to live a frustrating life of impatient waiting or to be empowered to exhibit patience while you wait.  

Reasonableness and the Refugee Crisis

My newsfeed is bursting at the seams with posts about the refugee crisis. Christians and non-Christians, Democrats and Republicans are adamantly expressing their support for one side of the debate or the other—should we take Syrian refugees or should we not?

What has struck me about many of the comments (on both sides) is that they treat the issue as if it is black-and-white, largely ignoring the complexity of the situation.

Any of you who know my background in studying history know that I’m all about avoiding oversimplification, and the comments on this issue reek of it.  So my plea with all of you today is that, whatever your position is, you evaluate it and the other side with reasonableness, recognizing that this very well could be a “both/and” not an “either/or” issue.

For example, Christians who are emphasizing our responsibility to be compassionate are not incorrect; we are to show compassion to others. However, some of those same Christians are assuming—without seeking to understand the reasons and thought-processes behind the objection—that if anyone objects to accepting Syrian refugees they are necessarily being uncompassionate and untrue to the gospel.

Similarly, Christians who think we should delay accepting Syrian refugees accuse those who want to allow them in of being foolish and naïve.

Brothers and sisters in Christ, this should not be! We, of all people, should be good thinkers and good listeners! Remember the exhortation the Holy Spirit gave us through the apostle Paul: “Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand;” (Philip. 4:5).

While you are trying to contend for the gospel, do not become a stumbling block through your unreasonableness and/or pride. Because the truth is, it’s possible to be compassionate and wise at the same time. What we need to focus on, then, is how to do just that.  

Why ‘Stand with France’ Isn’t Just a Cliché

Like many of you, I cloaked my profile picture in the French flag and posted statuses about praying for Paris. In the aftermath of such horrific events, it is easy to be swept up in the emotion of the moment, to hop on the bandwagon of a cause and pick up a rallying cry.

But for me, changing my picture and posting inspirational images is about more than the satisfaction of being part of something bigger than myself.  The hashtag PrayforParis and the call to stand with France are much more than mere clichés—or at least they should be.

Here are four reasons why:

1) France and the United States have a long and profoundly connected history.

It is fairly safe to say that if it weren’t for France, the United States would not even exist as an independent nation. Without her aid in the Revolutionary War, it is doubtful the British would have surrendered. This relationship with our oldest ally was further strengthened when the French bestowed upon us that iconic symbol of freedom, democratic government, and the American dream—Lady Liberty herself.

In the 20^th century, France and the United States remained allies throughout both World Wars, and, at the dawn of the 21^st, France supported the U.S. in the wake of 9/11. Now that a similar attack has taken place on French soil, it is only fitting that Americans continue to uphold the bond of friendship, letting the French people know that we feel their pain—with empathy, not merely sympathy—and that they are in our thoughts and prayers as they struggle through the days ahead.

Incidentally, I believe, this history explains why Americans have responded to the Parisians with such an immediate outpouring of support and proliferation of attention in contrast to the level of response to similar attacks happening much more frequently in the Middle East. The abundance of attention is not to make less of Lebanon, Syria, or any other country experiencing terrorist attacks but rather to make more of France.

Perhaps this seems to be unfair favoritism, but it’s a fact of life that we tend to think, speak, and write about things we care about and that we tend to care about things we are connected to. Paris simply hits closer to home—not only geographically, but ideologically as well, which brings me to my second point.

2) Ideas are important.

The present conflict is not primarily about land or wealth—it’s about a set of ideas, a way of understanding the world, a belief system that informs a way of life. Worldviews are significant because they are the foundation on which everything else stands, the base out of which action springs, as was clearly illustrated in the Paris attacks.

The worldview held by Islamic terrorists is diametrically opposed to that which has shaped and characterized Western civilization for centuries upon centuries. Standing with France, then, is affirming to yourself and to the world that you support the ideological pillars of Western civilization—the dignity of the individual, the rule of law, the value of intellectual discourse, and what is likely the most predominant characteristic of the West today—freedom—freedom of religion, of speech, and of the press, just to name a few.

If we do not know what we stand for or forget the importance of what we stand for, then we are setting ourselves up to lose it all at the hands of those who do know exactly what they believe and are willing to die to see their beliefs spread across the globe.

3) Freedom is worth fighting for.

The Islamic State is seeking to create just that—an Islamic state that eradicates Western values and imposes an Islamic religion-as-state/state-as-religion way of life.  The terrorists carrying out these attacks are doing so for very purposeful reasons. Their worldview is incompatible with that of Western civilization, and they are completely determined to ensure that their way of ordering society is the one that prevails.

Of course, it should go without saying that not all Muslims are bent on creating a world-wide Islamic caliphate. There are countless peaceful Muslims (like the two women I shared a meal with last week—some of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet!) and countless others who are oppressed by people within their own religion—which again raises the question: why is there not outcry on behalf of those victims?

Why do we seem more concerned about attacks in Paris than those in the Middle East? Along with the reason mentioned earlier, I submit that it is also because the Paris attacks mark an expansion of terrorism outside of already Muslim-dominated lands. As such, they are more blatant threats not just to people but to our very civilization. Yes, we should direct attention to the atrocities happening to civilians in Muslim countries. But the attacks in Paris signified much more than the deaths of 100+ individuals; they signified a brazen affront to freedom itself.

4) Christ has overcome the world (Jn. 16:33).

For those of us who are Christians, the most compelling reason to support the French people is that we have been entrusted with the hope of the world—Christ, the hope of glory (Col. 1:27). Because of this, we can offer the strongest Support there is to those who are hurting, angry, and confused.

As a secular society, France is filled with people who give no thought to God—people like the Charlie Hebdo cartoonist who has asked people not to pray for Paris. This request highlights how so-close-yet-so-far the French people are from the truth. The cartoonist is right—the French don’t need more religion. They need Jesus. No matter how great their zest for life, they live their days as we once did, “having no hope and without God in the world” (Eph. 2:12). So even with all the music and champagne, in forsaking Christ they rob themselves of an abundant life of persevering joy.

But we have the good news of hope and peace, of forgiveness, mercy, and grace in the midst of cynicism, bitterness, and fear, and sharing it is the best way we can help the people of France.

Yet it doesn’t stop there. This news is so powerful that it compels us Christians to expand our focus beyond France and recognize that the gospel “is the power of God for salvation” in every country—secular, Muslim, or otherwise (Rom. 1:16). 

In addition to praying for Paris, then, we must pray for and share with the whole world, because we have been entrusted with the greatest hope of all—the knowledge that even in the face of incredible evil, Christ reigns supreme and is seated at the right hand of God the Father, having conquered sin and death and having overcome the world.

The Diversity Delusion

In 21^st-century America, diversity has become the golden standard, the banner under which organizations operate and the measure by which they are evaluated. Although I haven’t researched the growth of this trend, the elevation of diversity as a benchmark and/or a battle cry is likely related to our nation’s past of segregation—at least that is what we are told:  that diversity, whether in the workplace, in the schoolhouse, or elsewhere, is needed to reverse the way things were under Jim Crow, that it is evidence of the fact that we have realized the error of our ways and have corrected them.

But is that really what the current push for “diversity” does?

It is most definitely true that segregation is one of the darkest blots in the annals of our nation’s history. And it is also true that such discrimination is wrong and unacceptable. But relating cries for “diversity” to the history of discrimination leads to the premise that the absence of diversity indicates the presence of discrimination—a premise which is not necessarily true.

Why is that a problem?

Because it morphs diversity from something that is no longer avoided into something that is actively sought after for its own sake—and there’s a difference.

The triumph of America’s post-segregation years has been that diversity has been rightly recognized as something that is not bad, not to be feared, not to be avoided. But this shift of perspective where diversity is concerned has continued to the point where diversity is now seen as the ultimate good, as something that is to be intentionally sought after and obtained.

Again, why is that a problem?

Because when organizations seek after diversity, they are oftentimes seeking after it for the wrong reasons (e.g. we need to hire/recruit more African Americans, Asians, and Hispanics or we’ll be seen as discriminatory and/or lose our funding). So what do they do? They create strategies to increase the diversity on campus, in their business, etc. And what does that do to the people of various ethnicities who will be recruited and/or hired under these strategies?

Think about it for a second…

Whether overtly or not, such a perspective devalues them as individuals because they are not being sought after for their personal strengths or abilities but rather for the color of their skin. They are being identified by their ethnicity and brought on board so that the company, school, etc. can broadcast to the world that they are “diverse.”

But people from previously-discriminated-against populations are still being given the opportunity of a job or an education, you might be thinking. Isn’t that a good thing? Yes, but how would you like to know that the reason someone wanted to recruit you to attend their school or work at their business was because of your skin color? What would that tell you about what is most valued in you? Your mind? Your abilities? The content of your character? No, your skin. I don’t know about you, but that sounds a lot like what minorities have been trying to get away from for so long.

Some might argue, Well what do you know about it? You’re not a minority. No, but I am a woman, and the same goes for women in the workplace as well. I, for one, would not want to be the token woman on staff, hired merely to show that the company is not sexist. To be in such a position would be to have my value as an employee based in my gender rather than in my competence—which, when you get right down to it, is actually another form of discrimination. It’s just discrimination for instead of discrimination against.

Thus, we arrive at a second false premise mirroring the first, namely, that the presence of diversity equals the absence of discrimination.  

Is all this to say that diversity in and of itself is a negative thing? Not at all!

As a Christian, I understand the beauty of diversity because I know God to be the source of variety in His creation and because the Church universal (the body of believers across all space and time) is the most diverse body to ever exist. But the beauty of diversity in the Church is found in the recognition that at our core we are all the same. We have all fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23), and we have all been offered freedom from our slavery to sin because our Maker died in our place. Those who have accepted this gift and surrendered their lives to Jesus are the same yet again—this time as redeemed human beings.

In the diversity of the Church, then, there is unity—a unity that is based on the knowledge that our value and identities are in Christ. With this understanding as the foundation, diversity may truly flourish as it is revealed to be the beautiful element of God’s design that it is.

It is my hope that in the years to come our nation can move toward a truer understanding of diversity—one that celebrates the variety among us while also recognizing the commonalities among our differences. And I hope that instead of elevating diversity itself to the place of highest value, we learn to value what is infinitely more precious: people themselves.