Be Slow as Molasses…to Anger

Perhaps you’ve heard the phrase “slow as molasses.” Usually, the expression is used to articulate frustration that something or someone is not moving as quickly as we would like them to. If you’ve never looked into the ironic origin of the phrase, look up the Great Molasses Flood of 1919—fascinating story. But I digress. 

In our fast-paced American culture, being slow moving is not the most admired trait. Even in the Christian life, there are many things we are to be quick to do—to listen, to love, to be kind, to pray—but there are some cases when slowness is desirable, and the one I’d like to focus on today is being angry.

Our culture is so obsessed with “being true to ourselves,” which usually involves expressing our “authentic” feelings, that we often accept anger as a good, healthy response simply because it is our most natural response. But we must be wary of looking to our current cultural context as the standard of health over and against the standard of Scripture. Take a look at Proverbs 19:11.

“Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense” (ESV).

Did you catch that? This verse tells us that being slow to become angry is an indication of having good sense and that it is actually praiseworthy not to react in anger. But wait—there’s more . . .

“Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly” (Prov. 14:29, ESV).

“A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention” (Prov. 15:18, ESV).

“Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city” (Prov. 16:32, ESV).

Yeah, but those are just descriptive verses making observations about the way things are, you might be thinking; they’re not telling me to be slow to anger. True, but James is.

“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;” (James 1:19, ESV).

Likewise, God tells us numerous times through Paul to put away anger (see Ephesians 4:31, Colossians 3:8, 1 Timothy 2:8, etc.). Okay, but if someone hurts me, I have a right to be angry. What’s the big deal about being angry when someone does me wrong?  I am so glad you asked.

There are plenty of reasons we should be wary of this vice (not to mention the mere fact that God tells us to put it away from ourselves). For starters, anger is a trap. It might feel good for a moment, and we might feel justified in embracing it, but it has a relentless grip once it takes hold of a soul, and it spawns something perhaps even more devastating: bitterness. These two feed off of each other—and off of us—souring our attitude, tainting our perspective, paralyzing our prayer life, suffocating our spirits, stifling our growth, and destroying our witness. Anger is not to be taken lightly.

The next verse in James gives another reason why we should be slow to anger: “for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (James 1:20, ESV). Why do we care about producing the righteousness of God? Because as Christians, we are called to exhibit God’s righteousness in greater and greater degrees as He molds, shapes, and transforms us into the likeness of Christ (aka God). And guess what—God is slow to anger.

The verse that immediately comes to mind referencing this attribute of God is Exodus 34:17, where God is revealing and describing Himself to Moses: “The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness,” (ESV).

Upon further investigation, though, there are so many more references to God’s being slow to anger. Rather than spell out all of them here, I’ll just list them and let you dig into your own copy of God’s Word. Check out Numbers 14:18, Nehemiah 9:17, Psalm 86:15, Psalm 103:8, Psalm 145:8, Joel 2:13, Jonah 4:2, and Nahum 1:3.

So it’s pretty clear that being slow to anger is a good thing. But what does that look like? 
Well, I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I can tell you from experience that it’s not pretty . . .

Several years ago, the Lord led me through a period of deep emotional pain where anger and bitterness were constantly clambering at the door of my mind and heart. Some days, I gave in, but other days, by the grace of God, the greatest desire of my spirit was to resist. I kept hearing the words of my former pastor Dr. Adrian Rogers that storms and struggles in life will either make you bitter or make you better, and I was determined not to become a bitter young woman. But let me tell you, it. was. hard.

Never before had I experienced such an intense internal struggle or such a strong, almost palpable, awareness of the existence of both my flesh and the Spirit. They were warring against each other, and the battle was fierce. To many observers and companions through this particular storm, I had every reason to be angry. My hurt was incredibly real and the cause of it seemingly unjust.

But God in His abundant patience poured out His grace in my life as He took the chisel to my heart, showing me the magnitude of my own grievances against Him and the utter lack of any right whatsoever that I had to hold a grudge against others, no matter how deep and painful the wounds they inflicted.

My flesh was not a fan of that notion, wanting to cling to a sense of entitlement, curl up in a ball, and lick my wounds, but the Spirit was doing His work, fulfilling God’s promise to guide me into truth, help me in my weakness, and continue the work of shaping me into someone presentable before Himself.

You see, He had called me years earlier, when I became His child, “to put off [my] old self, which belongs to [my] former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires [e.g. those that say that being angry will make me feel better, that justifying my cause will take away the pain, that holding grudges and putting up walls around my heart will keep me safe and make me stronger], and to be renewed in the spirit of [my mind], and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:22-24, ESV). And now He was bringing that calling to bear in my life—a calling that included being slow to anger.

Full disclosure: Was I angry at periods during that season? Yes. Did I have a right to be, by the world’s standards? Yes. Was my self-focused anger pleasing to God? No. But, praise His name, He gave me the strength to repent and resist the forces that sought to harden my heart. It was messy and exhausting, both spiritually and physically. 

In short, it was far from pretty—but it was beautiful.

Why do I share all of this? Because I’m convinced that anger and bitterness are some of the enemy’s greatest weapons, and I am just as convinced that He who is in us is greater than our enemy and his traps (1 Jn. 4:4). The same Spirit that is in me is the same Spirit that is in every child of God, and if He could help me prevail in the struggle all those years ago, He can help all of His children.

I am living proof that He is strong and faithful, for I know without a shadow of a doubt that His grace is the only way I was able to fight and prevail. Sharing this piece of my story is in no way to say, “Look at me,” but rather to say, “Look to Him!” His grace is sufficient, beloved!

Does all of this mean we should never acknowledge our anger? By no means! Does this mean we should always feel guilty when anger is our response? Not necessarily. But it does mean that anger is something we should not blindly embrace in the name of “being true to ourselves.” It does mean that we should examine our hearts, bare our souls before our Savior, and let Him point out to us when our anger is unrighteous, i.e. when it is self-serving, self-justifying, and self-focused (and no, anger over wrongs done to those we love is not always selfless).

We should fight against its chains with every ounce of our weakness and His abundant strength, because this is the fight we were purchased for. Make no mistake, it will be painful. It will involve relinquishing perceived rights. It will require letting go. But, oh friend, the prize to be gained is worth so much more than whatever you are holding onto. The joy and peace to be found in Jesus is indescribably good. The freedom to be found in handing over those burdens and chains to our resurrected Savior is matchless.

Do not be lulled into the trap of anger.  Do not be afraid of acknowledging your weakness to the One who already knows its depths. Do not hesitate to wrestle in the strength of the Spirit against the forces of evil that seek to disarm you. Trust in the Lord and His strength. Kneel in submission and prayer, and stand up to fight. Be slow to anger and quick to run to Him. Trust me, it is worth it. He is worth it.

He is worth it all.

To read the Arabic translation of this post, click here.

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